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56. Alive and Free
This past week, I’ve been spending some good quality time with God reading through Jeremiah, probably the first time I’ve ever gone through the entire book…and I feel like I’m learning tons! It gives a really good picture of God’s heart..what He desires, what He hates, what His character is like. It’s forced me to wrestle with issues I’ve kind of been trying to ignore for a while and facing my sin straight on.
This past year, I learned some difficult lessons on how God would rather you be completely honest with Him with the way you live, than trying to do all the “right” or “good” things but your heart is far from Him. Genuine faith, where the intent is pure, and a genuine action follows. Hypocrisy is far from what Christianity should be, even though we often lives our lives as people who say one thing but do another. But these last few days, I’ve been really torn, kinda feeling broken, aware of my weaknesses and sins. I was torn between trying to love God by obeying Him, while being honest with myself and my true intentions. A lot of the time, I’m selfish with my time, my schedule, my resources. I gossip, I judge, I do not act out of love. My compassion for people comes and goes. I can be cynical and bitter, ungrateful and inconsiderate. I try, I fail, I give up. It’s a sobering process, knowing what kind of rut sin can get you in.
But each day, God has revealed that I am not stuck in my sin. He has made a way already for me to live a life of freedom and of grace. Paul says in Romans 8:
10But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. 11And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.
Jesus, help me. Show me how to love You more so that obeying Your Word wouldn’t be so hard sometimes. The power of Christ, lives in me. That is something to sing and praise God for. :)
